OpenEuphoria

Re: Tech Support (or, Family Counseling)

• Posted by jjnick at cvn.com Jun 11, 2001
• 349 views

Actually, I have a solution.  To purge Wife 1.0, simply format, and
re-install Girlfriend 7.0 . . .

----- Original Message -----
From: "Travis Beaty" <travisbeaty at arn.net>
To: "EUforum" <EUforum at topica.com>
Subject: Tech Support (or, Family Counseling)


>
> Yes, folks, I know this is extremely off-topic, but this made me bust a
gut
> laughing and I can't help but share it.  I didn't write this, but boy I
wish I had!
> LOL
>
> --------------------------------------
>
> >Dear Tech Support "LAPTOP SERVICES (Pty Ltd)",
> >
> >I am desperate for some help. I recently upgraded from Girlfriend
> >7.0 to Wife 1.0 and found that the new program began unexpected
> >child processing and also took up a lot of space and valuable
> >resources.
> >
> >This wasn't mentioned in the product brochure. In addition Wife
> >1.0 installs itself into all other programs and launches during
> >system initialisation where it monitors all other system activity.
> >
> >Applications such as Boys Night Out 2.5, and Golf 5.3 no longer run
> >and crash the system whenever selected. Attempting to operate
> >Saturday Rugby 6.3 always fails but Saturday Shopping 7.1 runs
> >instead. I cannot seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background whilst
> >attempting to run any of my favourite applications. I am thinking
> >about going back to Girlfriend 7.0 but de-install doesn't work on
> >this program.
>
> >Can you please help.
> >Joe
>
>
> Dear Joe,
>
> This is a very common problem resulting from a basic
> misunderstanding.  Many men upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0
> thinking that Wife 1.0 is merely a UTILITIES & ENTERTAINMENT
> program. Whereas Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM designed by its
> creator to run everything. You are unlikely to be able to purge Wife
> 1.0 and still convert back to Girlfriend 7.0 as Wife 1.0 is not
> designed to do this and it is impossible to
> de-install, delete or purge the program files from the system once
> installed. Some people have tried to install Girlfriend 8.0 or Wife
> 2.0 but have ended up with even more problems. (See in manual under
> Alimony/Child Support and Solicitors Fees).  Having Wife 1.0
> installed myself I recommend you keep it installed and deal with the
> difficulties as best you can.  When any faults or problems occur,
> whatever you think has caused
> them, you must run the C:\ I APOLOGISE program and avoid attempting to
> use the *Esc-key. It may be necessary to run C:\ I APOLOGISE a
> number of times but hopefully eventually the operating system will
> return to normal. Wife 1.0 although a very high maintenance program
> can be very rewarding. To get the most out of it consider buying
> additional software such as Flowers 2.0 and Chocolates 5.0.
>
> Do not under any circumstances install Secretary (Short Skirt
> version) as this is not a supported application for Wife 1.0 and the
> system will almost certainly crash.
>
> Best of luck Tech Support
>