Re: Allow me to introduce myself...
Hmm...
I'd reply to this post by flaming your ass down to the first layers around
the earth's core....
But since you sound so pathetic (<- did I spell this right? Master?) I saved
you from the pain of hummiliation.
I'm not an american, for one.
The fact that you do not know this clearly proves to me that you do not know
who I am. Therefore, please shut your ass. No w8, it's your mouth. nah
what's the difference...
And read what I says, I'm an AI coder, not a linguest.
Mike The Spike
>
> > Hi yall!
> > Hehe...
> > Finally, the time has cum for me to drag my white ass through the hills
>of
> > deceit and bullshititus, and throw away my mantle of illusions and
> > compulsive brainwashing psychology...
> > Heh?
>Ya? You don't say?
>
> > Allright.
> > Some of you may remember me.
> > Some of you may know me.
> > But none of you truly do ;)
>Enlighten! We beseech you!
> > My name is Mike [The Spike] Smith.
>Well met?!?!? I think???
>
>
> > I am an artificial intelligence programmer for a large language and
>speech
> > recognition company.
>[[[ I would hate to use that speech recognition software, considering
> ]]]
>[[[ many spelling errors and grammatical mistakes are present in this
>email...]]]
>
> > Alongside programming AI in C, I have other little hobbies and projects
> > going on.
>[[[Miniscule is more like it, I'm sure.]]]
>
> > One of them is programming in Euphoria, another is working on a crapload
>of
> > revolutionary (3D) software products in C,
>[[[Crapload .... apt word to describe your wares.]]]
>
> >and the last one is... messing
> > with people's heads, physical and psychological ;)
>
> > I am known around the Internet for my extreme use of obscene language
>and
> > powerfull seductive methods.
>[[[And for your horrid grammer as well, as it should read: "powerfull
>seduction methods"... ]]]
>
> > WTF am I doing here?
> > I'll explain...
>There is no need for that, honest. You have graced us so much thusly, to
>date.
>
>
> > A long time ago, I met with a small group of (former) Euphoria
>programmers
> > on IRC, names witheld. We started a discussion of wich language was more
> > powerfull, C or Euphoria. Soon people started to shit on Euphoria's name
>in
> > a way of saying "We want a more!",
>"We want a more!" ????????????
>I would suggest making one of your little hobbies the daily perusal of text
>books
>guiding you in the use of the english language....Oh wait, that's right,
>your skills
>for all things are beyond reproach. My bad.
>
> >AKA a compiler, various DLL, OCX and
> > dynamic interprettation features. Because they knew my powerfull
> > psychological bullshiting ways of getting things done, they asked me to
>have
> > a little "convincing chat" with RDS.
>And your blessing RDS with your gleaming banter is inspiring...I can hardly
>contain myself, and the things within myself, thus the need for a rapid and
>hasty excursion to the lavatory...
>*wretches and heaves*
>
> > The galant black knight on a shiny
> > white Compaq wich I am, I did them one better. I fucked each and every
>one
> > of you people's heads over, including RDS's, untill, well, yall got what
>you
> > wanted.
>[[[ Ugh, the grammer is beyond repair...]]]
>
> > Are you starting to catch on?
>nawwww...
>We are all simplistic morons on this listserver, without a prayer of ever
>attaining your
>level of annunciation, diction, eloquence or prowess. We can only bask in
>the glow
>that you radiate, and hope to glean insight from your guidance.
>
> > Mike The Spike, Jason Leit, Drake Ice...
> > All me ;)
>*sneezes* Pardon, don't mind me, or me, or me either...
>
> > By convincing RDS they had competition in creating a Euphoria
>"compiler",
> > with awesome cool features wich we'd all want to see in Euphoria, I got
>them
> > to start working on their own compiler.
>Your influencial prowess never ceases to astound me, or me, or me either...
>
> > Many have notticed this was just a plot (especially RDS) when I was
>offering
> > tips on how to implement features into a Euphoria compiler, and my
> > remarkable "Go ahead! I don't mind!" way of dealing with the fact that
>RDS
> > anounced that they would "try to beat me to it". To make sure they'd
> > actually work on it, I did not make myself knowledgable to you all.
>Subterfuge! Alas, will the wonder that is you, or you, or you, ever know a
>limit?
>
> >But now
> > that the Euphoria compiler is as good as finnished, and RDS plans to
>release
> > within the next few months, I came clean.
>I was unsure the premise of you becoming clean was plausible, let alone
>possible.
>Thanks for clearing that up for us, and us, and us.
>
> >Drake Ice was a final way to
> > express myself about what Euphoria's flaws were, and Jason Leit a way to
>get
> > info on the current status of the project, plus throw out some
>benchmarks
>to
> > convince RDS that the game was far from won.
>"throw out" was exactly what I did with them...
>*click*
>("Are you sure you wish to empty all files in the trash can?" <yes>)
>
>
> > I am "hired help", and did not want to keep this Convincing RDS promise
> > bugging me for too long, too.
>For a sly, worldy man, such as yourself, and yourself, and yourself,
>certainly
>there is nothing you cannot handle? After all, nothing so banal as keeping
>a promise could possibly 'bug you', could it? For it to 'bug you', you have
>to actually worry about keeping it, and one such as you doesn't bother
>with such petty things since it would be beneath you, would it not?
>
> > Allthough I did fullfill it pretty damned good by posting on various
>mailing
> > lists and non-Euphoria related bulletin boards to create tension.
>Yes, that seems logical, post off-topic more often to other boards...
>We might even thank you for that...
>
> > So, anyone wich I offended in my fictive posts...
> > A. It was exaturated, but some of you do suck white ass! Go fuck a
>humming
> > bird, needle dicks!
> > B. It was an act. Deal with it.
>Your wealth of talents precludes amazement, as we are too awed to be
>able to cope with them all simultaneously. Coder, psychologist, and now
>actor?
>Wonderous, indeed, your depth astounds!
>
> > Heh?
> > Well ok, err, there is some thanking you should do now!
>Naturally, I almost missed that opportunity...At least I didn't miss the
>prior opportunity to thank you, which, hopefully, means there is still
>hope for me, and me, and me?
>
> > Come on! It's the only way I'm getting payed!
><<see below>>
>--snip--
> > Well now that my work here is done, I do have to warn RDS, I actually
> > allready have a Euphoria++ to C translator written in C++, so don't
>think
> > this is the end of it, since my marketing skills are "Out of this
>universe".
> > Hey! I didn't become wealthy using the national lottery, pal!
>No, as you mentioned, the only way you are getting "payed" (paid *cough*)
>is via our gratitude, as stated above.
>*note to self: send memo to Merriam/Webster about redefining the word
>"pauper"
>to include reference to above*
>
> > I just don't feel the need to market a Euphoria++ compiled programming
> > language, right now. <- nottice "right now"!
>Yes, I "notticed" it the first time as your gift for being overly critical
>has been
>imparted upon my being by your ever so kind teachings.
>
> > So keep working on that translator RDS, and implement Dynamic
> > Interprettation, or you'll feel a bit of MTS up your ass!
>I have had to use a rather large amount of Dynamic Interpretation to
>decipher
>this dribble, but that is likely only based upon a random programming
>oversight
>commited on my part, a failure in the parser I expect... *runs off to the
>laboratory
>to fine tune his "atrocious email" parsing subroutines*
>
> > Hehe...
> > Mike The Spike
> > PS. Don't you just hate me?
> > ...
> > Don't awnser or I'll flush your foot down the toilet!
>Have no fear, I wouldn't dream of "awnsering" as it sounds far too advanced
>for
>me to attempt.
>
>
>Personal note: I have refrained from posting replies to all of the MUHAHAHA
>posts, but I cannot resist an opportunity such as this to provide a free
>laugh
>to everyone here ;)
>
>--Hawke'
>
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