10 Reasons Why You're Going To Cuss At Euphoria!
- Posted by Mike The Spike <mtsreborn at yahoo.com> Feb 03, 2001
- 376 views
Newbie Programmers Listen Up! 10 Reasons Why You're Going To Cuss At Euphoria! -*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* - Because you repeatedly read that Euphoria was fast, so you spent 3 years of your life programming a 3D game, wich turned out to run at -20 frames per second. - Because you read that you can call C routines, so you bought Euphoria, only to find out later that you have to buy a C compiler too to find out what the predifined types are. - Because you have being a loyal customer for 8 years, and still weren't able to write a program that doesn't run 5 times slower than 'C'. - Because 'C' gave you a rope to hang yourself with, but Euphoria also gave you the Hierarchical tree to tie it to. - Because Euphoria does more run-time checks on your code than it does optimizations. - Because you read Euphoria's claims of being more portable than C, and are now being sued by Sony Interactive because you didn't produce that Playstation game you planned to port from DOS. - Because your company's stocks plummeted right after you switched to Euphoria, because it took you 7 years to publish that 3D modeling tool for Linux, since you had to write your own 3D API because Euphoria doesn't support any natively. - Because you died of old age when you started programming that 3D API for Euphoria when you were 12, because it took 68 years before a single frame was drawn. - Because you read somewhere that Euphoria was used to create high-speed DOS games, little did you know that they were mode 13h programs containing 90% assembly, when you hired 120 Euphoria programmers for your software house. - Because Daikatana was written in Euphoria, no matter what John Romero says ;) Hehe... I'm just kidding, if I didn't like Euphoria and didn't believe in it I wouldn't be here. I'd be down at microsoft.com trying to get Windows to become something descent ;) Mike The Spike